My TLP Story

The Living Passover has been such a huge part of my life, and I couldn’t imagine what my life would look like had I not been involved with this stage production. It is so intertwined with pieces of my own testimony as well.

This is currently my 6th TLP performance that I have been a part of. Every year God teaches me something new and grows me in my faith and worship. Every year, I know even more and more that He has redeemed me and the story that he has placed in me.

My first year involved with the Living Passover was in 2011. At the time my family was very new to the church where it was being performed and they needed help backstage so my family decided to volunteer. My Dad worked the mechanical curtains, my brother helped move sets and did computer projections, my mom pulled curtains, and I helped with the props.

The night that forever changed my life was March 30, 2011.

It was a dress rehearsal night and I remembered being very tired as I sat at the prop table. My mom was only a few feet away from me working the curtains, and I often liked to stand near her because there was a really great spot to peek out through the curtains and watch the show from there. After the crucifixion scene, I distinctly remember her telling me to go sit back down at the table because Jesus was about to pass by, meaning that they would bring him down from the cross and he would have to run to get cleaned up for the finale.

However looking back later, this phrase also has extreme spiritual value to me too. Because when the Lord passes by in your life, everything changes because of His presence.

Soon after that, a large sheer curtain called a scrim that’s the length of the stage (used for special lighting effects) with a 150 pound pole anchoring it at the bottom, fell from about 20 feet up and came crashing down straight on top of my mom’s head. I remember watching it like it was happening in slow motion, only it wasn’t. I immediately thought, “I just watched my mom die.”

I am so thankful that she did not die that day and that the Lord protected her and even protected me, because minutes ago I stood in that same spot with her.

Long story for another day, the miracle of this story is that even though that should have killed her, she did not have any broken bones, nor brain damage. She did have several stitches and a concussion that lingered for awhile. However, I have come to learn to not look to just the miracle, but to the One who is the God of miracles.

The whole experience of that night was incredibly traumatic and scary for me, and even though my mom was healed, there was some healing in my own life that God needed to work in me.

I wasn’t truly able to process my emotions until about three years later in 2014, when God began to redeem my story. For the longest time, I couldn’t ever tell the story of that night without crying and thinking about it for the rest of the day. I would think, “What is wrong with me, everything’s fine, Mom is fine. Why do I still feel this way? Why do I still hurt so much?”

There are so, SO many lessons that God has taught me over the years through this that I could go on and on for hours, but for time’s sake I will be brief. One day I might write a book of my entire detailed testimony, who knows.

In this long process of redemption and healing, the Lord has been so patient and gentle with me and for that I am so thankful.

One of the moments that is most powerful to me was in June of 2015 when my mom and I decided to go back to that spot where it all happened and pray together over that place. We prayed, we cried, we conquered that place together. And that day I was able to walk out of the church hand in hand with my mom instead of the night where she was taken away in an ambulance and I felt so alone. In those memories of that night, I could now picture a bright figure of peace standing there in the places where I was in the most pain and fear.

I have learned forgiveness, trust, joy through overwhelming grief, healing, and peace. God has helped me reconcile my fear and hurt with the glory of His goodness.

In telling my story, I wanted to be authentic and real in describing what I experienced and how I felt, but I also wanted to be respectful of the amazing Gloriousness of God and the absolute beauty that he has redeemed by story with. Healing does not happen overnight, and oftentimes it’s a long journey through mountains and valleys with the Lord. There are times that I have been angry with God, others, and myself. There have been times when I was bitter and scared. But I can honestly say that God has sustained me, and he has brought me through. His redemption of my heart is a continual, never-ending process.

Throughout the many years that I have been a part of TLP, it has been such a safe place and a constant in my life through times of turmoil and change. I am so incredibly thankful for The Living Passover. Through it, God has changed my life for His Glory. As this is my last year of The Living Passover before I go to college in the fall of 2018, it is very bittersweet for me. I’m going to have a LOT of emotions on the very last show. This year has been filled with so many wonderful people in the cast and I will always love my TLP family. I feel like this year has been such a gentle closing of one chapter’s season as I look to the next chapter of my life out at Liberty University next year. This season is ending, but God will always have more to teach me.

“I hear the Lord passing by…Have mercy on me Lord, hear my cry of desperation. I hear the Lord passing by.”

Through it all, God is good. Through it all, it is well with my soul.

To God be the Glory.

(Also, this is a picture of the journal that I first began to write out my testimony in and the things that the Lord has taught me through it.)